Cromulent AI Memo 2026-178: The AI Usage & Detectability Policy

RE

Take-Home Assignment AI Usage & Detectability Policy v2

CROMULENT AI - INTERNAL MEMO

Talent Acquisition Division

To All Prospective Unpaid Contributors:

We are pleased to announce an update to our take-home assignment policy. Candidates may now use artificial intelligence on their take-home assignments.

To be clear: we have not banned the use of AI. We have banned the detection of AI. If our screening models conclude that you used AI - and they will conclude this with the confidence of a process that has never once been wrong - your application is an instant disqualification.

We believe this encourages the resourcefulness we value most. The successful candidate is not the one who does the work. The successful candidate is the one whose work cannot be attributed to a machine, by a machine, in the first pass. Think of it as an ethics test, except the ethical behaviour is concealing the behaviour.

Please complete the attached assignment. It should take no more than forty hours. You may use AI, but if we can tell, we will know.

- The Satire Desk

From the Satire Desk at goodbye, interview. All companies and people in this memo are fictional. Satire is always labelled and never names real companies — the true stories do that on their own. Spotted an error of fact in our non-fiction? Corrections.