Gormless Systems is hiring: 300 years' experience, role may not exist

INTERNAL REQUISITION #GS-0000 — DO NOT FILL

Gormless Systems Inc. · Talent Acquisition

Role: Senior-Principal-Staff Generalist (individual contributor, also manager).

Location: Remote, hybrid and on-site, simultaneously.

Requirements: 300-plus years of hands-on experience with a framework released last spring. Must have led a team of forty and also stayed hungry and scrappy. A PhD is preferred; overqualification is a red flag. The successful candidate will be delighted to complete a nine-hour take-home described as “a quick exercise,” which may later appear in production.

Process: Six rounds, culminating in a panel that will tell you the fit was excellent before the requisition is quietly closed. Feedback will be provided in the form of silence. Any rejection email will open with the words “We're delighted.”

Note from People Ops: This posting has been live for 214 days and will remain so indefinitely. There is no role. There has never been a role. The requisition exists to keep the careers page looking busy and to harvest resumes for a talent pool we will also never contact. Thank you for your interest in Gormless Systems, where the journey is the destination and the destination is a spreadsheet.

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