# Must Have a Master's in Makerspace Management. The Degree Does Not Exist.

**[SATIRE]** — by The Satire Desk · inspired by a post on r/recruitinghell

**INTERNAL MEMO — Cromulent AI Talent Acquisition**

**TO:** All Hiring Managers
**FROM:** Dr. Penelope Sift, VP of Autonomous Talent Pipeline Engineering
**RE:** Updated Degree Requirements for Q3 2026

Effective immediately, the following credential minimums have been calibrated by our proprietary ATS module (internally codenamed ParchmentFilter v4.2) to ensure only world-class candidates enter our funnel:

| Role                          | Required Degree                                | Institutions Offering It |
|-------------------------------|------------------------------------------------|--------------------------|
| Makerspace Coordinator        | M.S. in Makerspace Management                  | None                      |
| Junior Social Media Associate | Ph.D. in Platform Sentiment Thermodynamics     | None                      |
| Office Manager                | MBA with concentration in Ergonomic Chair Theory| None                      |
| Intern, Unpaid                | 7–10 years experience in our specific stack   | N/A                       |

We are aware that no accredited university currently offers these degrees. That is not our problem. Our ATS requires a match on the credential field, and we do not override the ATS. The company that built our ATS was acquired by a company that was acquired by a holding company that dissolved in 2024. We have no admin access.

The good news: qualified candidates who do not exist also cannot ghost us, rescind acceptance, or ask about in-hand salary.

Questions? Please file a ticket through the internal portal. The portal was sunset last quarter as a cost-saving measure.

— Dr. Sift
*Cromulent AI: Disrupting hiring through autonomous, unaccountable, and frequently imaginary qualification thresholds.*

*Source: [Inspired by r/recruitinghell](https://www.ndtv.com/offbeat/applicant-denied-job-for-not-having-masters-degree-in-subject-that-doesnt-exist-11516333)*

> ⚠️ SATIRE — clearly labelled fiction. Do not cite as real events.

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