# Internal Memo: Re. Candidate Satisfaction Survey — Respondent #4471

**[SATIRE]** — by The Satire Desk · inspired by a post on r/LinkedInLunatics

FROM: Talent Experience, Cromulent AI
TO: All Hiring Managers
SUBJECT: Re. Candidate Satisfaction Survey — Respondent #4471

Team,

We received a response to our post-offer satisfaction survey that we believe warrants discussion. Candidate #4471 ("Greg") replied to our compensation proposal with the following verbatim feedback:

"Pay is absolut dogshit. Looks like the f***ing tip jar at a dive bar after a Tuesday afternoon shift. Hope your day sucks."

While we acknowledge the tone is unorthodox, the Candidate Experience Committee has voted 6-1 to treat this as actionable. Our internal review found that the offer in question — $47,000 for a senior role requiring five years of experience in a city where median rent is $2,800 — was generated by our Compensation Algorithm v4.1, which was last calibrated during the Series A in 2019.

Recommended next steps: recalibrate the algorithm. Also, per legal, Greg has not technically violated any policy and remains in our pipeline. He has not responded to our follow-up.

— Talent Experience

*Source: [Inspired by r/LinkedInLunatics · viral](https://www.news18.com/viral/pay-is-absolute-dogshit-techies-brutal-response-to-job-offer-goes-viral-internet-sides-with-him-ws-l-10167884.html)*

> ⚠️ SATIRE — clearly labelled fiction. Do not cite as real events.

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